Keeping Up with the Joneses

By: Susan A. Barry

Published On: December 28, 2011

How many times have you heard, “Keeping up with Joneses”? It’s comparing your material goods or lifestyle to your neighbors as a measure of worth. By not keeping up with the elusive Joneses, you might perceive yourself to be socially inferior.

Usually when someone talks about “keeping up with the Joneses” it’s a caution. Don’t do it. Don’t focus so much on what other people do and how they live.

But what if we could put a positive spin on it? What if the Joneses weren’t always accumulating more for their personal pleasure – what if the Joneses were seeking to live with less? And because they needed less they could give away more? Now those are some Joneses that I’d like to keep up with!

When it comes to material items, let’s be honest, people. We have a lot! Do we really need more? I want to start a new movement, one in which we measure ourselves not so much by what we have, but by how much we care.

As we start a new year, I have decided to redraw my personal pie chart of priorities. There will be slices for family, friends and material needs (not wants), but I want my money to look different. I’m going to make a bigger slice for charitable giving. I have decided to give with intention, and I’m going give away 5% of what I make. Certainly I’ll start this process with a budget, but I’m also going to start with a question: What do I want to influence? When I think about my spending, how will I answer the “why” question? This new attitude won’t just impact me. This will also be a shift for my fourteen-year-old daughter. I am going to give her what I think is the greatest gift this year...the value of scarcity. She and I are going to learn how to live fully and richly with necessities and truly appreciate them. OK, I know this might not go over so well at first. Living with a teenager is challenging enough without layering on a life lesson! And it’s difficult to see the value of your lifestyle when you see others who seem to have it all – you might wish your life were like that as well. But if we cut back a few items here and there, we won’t go hungry and we truly won’t go without.  

One strategy I plan to use is that every time I buy a piece of clothing, I am going to set aside something for charity. If I buy $100 worth of clothing, I will set aside $5 (that’s 5%) for charity. Or I might set out a piece of clothing – nothing new goes in the closet unless I take something old out! This goes for my daughter’s purchases as well.

When it comes to my ongoing monetary contributions, I am going to give in several ways. Of course I’ll give through the Community Foundation, but also Metro United Way, the Fund for the Arts, and I am going to give directly to charities and causes that I personally care about most. I also want my daughter to experience the joy and responsibility of giving, so I am going to set aside some additional dollars for her to give on her own. This will be for her causes, not necessarily mine! And I’m going to encourage her to dig just a little deeper to find ways she can help the charity she cares most about, Breaking New Grounds.

As I said before, I want this to become a movement. Imagine if a group of us committed to all giving away more in 2012! It could be our own kind of Giving Pledge, a pledge to give right here in the Louisville metro area.  More time, more money, more ideas, more energy … all to make our community a better place. We can really change our world with just a little bit more.

So join me as I enjoy what I have, live in the moment, and create a space where generosity and social responsibility becomes part of my family’s story. I’m committed to giving away more and living with less, and becoming part of a powerful community legacy. Just call me “Susan Barry Jones” – can you keep up with me?